Sunday, July 27, 2008 . 22:48
Somehow this is what I really feel;
Every time I think of you,
I get shot right through
into a bolt of blue(depressed,dejected,low,fed up)
It's no problem of mine truly,
But it's a problem I find,
trying to leave a life I can't leave behind.
Friends there's really no sense in telling me,
The wisdom of a fool won't set me free
That's the way that it goes
and it's what nobody really knows.
It's just everyday my confusion grows.
I feel fine & I feel good.
But I feel like I never should.
Whenever I get this way
I just don't know what to say.
Why can't we be ourselves like we were yesterday.
Every time I think of you
I get down on my knees and pray.
Just waiting for the final moment you said the words that I can't said.
Thursday, July 17, 2008 . 23:27
I, I miss you so much.
You, you left me feeling high and dry.
You, you knew what you were doing to me
And
I,I guess I was too blind to see.
Blind to see what you are doing to me.
Yet you, had another direction.
Leaving me with nothing but a dead connection.
If I were to call you,
I'll say that I'm fine,
But you can't tell by the tone of my voice, it's just a lie.
It hurts. But I would do it again to relive what we had.
~The Canopy Promise~
I will hold up to it.
Will you hold up to it? Don't lead me on to a place where, where it's timeless for me.I may be another option,choice yet why placed me in the shopping cart?
Lukewarmness is not right for me. Please either be hot or cold.
Friday, July 11, 2008 . 00:15
The date approaches slowly. Flipping through the mails, I realized that it all began on the same day. Being brought together on the same date but we still parted unknowingly. It had been four years. That's kinda long. We all have grown up and yet.. sigh.
Then was then while my words was filled with passion and adoration. It was the turning point. The prelude to all that I am now. The beginning of the story. Gay was still the word and now it is still the word for me.
This poem of the yesteryear was sent and was charged with feelings I couldn't comprehend. It's all too late for me realize it now. I lost a part of me to you.
I still miss you. I still pray.
Little Things
by Eric W.
So often I tend to notice things,
And cannot help but think of you
A certain flower or a baby`s smile
Something as silly as the color blue
Or a morning`s breeze across my face,
Like your gentle whisper in my ear
The rubbing on of a certain scent,
And I swear it`s just like you`re here
And the little things that often pass,
Without a second thought or wonder why
Later seem to mean so much
So dear to my heart it makes me cry
A song who's lyrics can open my love
Unleashing such feelings for you
I picture us dancing so close, so tight
And how all my dreams have come true
As the sun fades, day gives way to night,
And the stars begin to shine,
I see each sparkle from inside your eyes,
And that`s how I know that you`re mine
It`s the simple things like this,
That though apart, I continue to see
I pray for the day we`re together as one
And share all these "little things" with me
Julian L.
Monday, July 07, 2008 . 23:03
It was such an abrupt start to the sleepy Monday morning with dreams hanging in halt. Why does the yearning increases as the day approaches. My motivation is brandish with flame of determination to head on without looking back. Grant me the mental capabilities and physical power to go by and through it.
Skinning of the surface just reveals what mechanism is working underneath the façade.
HEY,
I didn’t want to lose this chance,
Because I will never know when it will come by again.
I am Julian.
Friday, July 04, 2008 . 23:21
Feelings that was hidden deep now resurface to haunt. I can't possible fool myself any longer. As much as I yearn to break free from this self-devouring cycle, I am actually not covering any grounds at all. Maybe it's just the time of the year again. The 196 day of the year is coming closer. The date that hold too much of my mystery and my pain.
This is the date that I would like to rejoice in and yet collapse into emotions overhaul.
Every single moment, I really would like to confess; to me you are perfect. I can't just do that. It will just spoil everything that I had been carefully protecting. I look like I don't bother, I don't even want to speak about. But the truth I know, I am not ready for anything.
Does it take someone else to set me free from this mental encasement? Someone to steal the ideal from me?
There seems to be a barrier that somehow unbreakable. Is it the past? Or does the future had something intricate install for us?
Personally I would like to take the past as memories, the future as an adventure but the present as a gift.
Would you like to be part of it?
I am still me. If I had change, I wonder to what extend will that be?
Still a dreamer that floats in my world of fantasy. Aimless and naive. Would circumstances force me to be take things the other way round? Do I really have to do it and cause some unpleasantness? Yet I will give it a pass. I ain't cut out for it.
Still a jewel?